One of the central goals within communication is to establish whether people are on the same wavelength. Although such assessment can occur objectively, by exchanging and comparing viewpoints, people may also derive a sense of shared reality subjectively, through micro-dynamics in the form of conversation that inform them whether their views are shared. The present review outlines the role of these micro-dynamics in developing and regulating a shared reality. It focuses on three different contexts: intergroup communication, computer mediated communication and communication within intimate relationships. The review concludes with a discussion of the power of micro-dynamics in comparison to more explicit forms of social validation.